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Partnering for Success
The
course of our life, the things we achieve, the happiness we
feel, are all in some way effected by the people around us. This column includes tips on how to be more
successful and enjoy
life even in the tough times by forging winning
partnerships—partnerships that help you and those around you
prosper.
A
Column by Philippa Courtney
July 2002
Achieve the Impossible
There are few things in nature that rival the beauty of a horse
galloping free. My mother held this image close as she grew up
dealing with physical limitations. She even named me Philippa with
no idea that my name means lover of horses. She just knew that while
her body could not move freely her spirit always could. And my
father who fell in love with her at first sight never even noticed
that she dragged her leg until a year after they were married. My
mother didn't define herself by her limitations so why should he.
My father, who started working full time at the age of thirteen,
tried his hands at many different types of jobs and each time he
came home excited about a new possibility my mother would share his
excitement. Their partnership, the 52 years they were together, was
based on their belief that together they could achieve the
impossible and to a great extent they did.
None of us want anyone to place limits on our dreams, so who are we
to place limits on the dreams of others?
Yet when someone close to you mentions something they want to do
that you think is implausible do you find yourself thinking or even
saying, "There's no way you can do that, you don't have the skills
or experience, or the chances of that happening are a million to
one?"
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You probably express your concern and caution this way
because you want to protect your friends, family, coworkers,
and your mate from harm and disappointment. But have you
considered that they are not asking you for your protection
or your judgment; they may not even be asking you to share
their vision. What your partners want most is to have you
believe in them.
For some reason we find it easier to think of why we can't or
shouldn't do something than why we can or should. Listening
to other people's ideas and dreams may even remind us of the
disappointment we feel about not pursuing our own passions.
How can you help an inventive or entrepreneurial employee
pursue a goal that at first glance seems improbable? Research
and development need not be limited to the confines of a
specific department. Look at Hewlett and Packard and the
Wright Brothers; all it takes is a couple of people with
complimentary skills who join together to achieve a goal—no matter how impractical their ideas may have
originally seemed.
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If fear is infectious, so is
enthusiasm.
You can choose to be inspired by
other people's goals and dreams without judging the outcome.
You can accept their vision—even when
that vision doesn't match your own. |
You become a true partner in the success of others by shutting
out your own fearful or judgmental thoughts and opening up your
mind to possibilities. Where you might have previously
expressed doubt, try telling people you are happy to see how
excited they are about something. Tell them that you believe in
them—that you admire their courage and confidence to
try something new. Listen to their plan and ask them if there
is anything you can do to help them achieve it.
And when someone asks your opinion, first clarify what exactly
they want from you so you can provide what they need, not what
you think they should hear—like statistics and stories why others have
failed. They may just want you to review something they have
written or suggest a resource for some information they are
seeking.
The person who seeks possibilities creates them. The person who
sees problems finds them. This is more than a fortune cookie
philosophy. A positive mind produces a healthier life. Our
thoughts impact our bodies positively or negatively depending
on our inputs. There is scientific proof that people can reduce
the size of a tumor by undertaking a program of focused mental
imagery to fire up peptides that create changes in the body. It
takes effort to refocus your thoughts from the negative to the
positive. But the results can be astounding.
This coming week, each time you respond to someone's idea or
plan with an open mind and helpful attitude put a quarter in a
coffee mug. At the end of the week total up the quarters and
see how positive you were, then give the money away to someone
who needs it. You may have to work at it at first. But after a
while your reconditioned mental muscles will take over and you
will find people reciprocating. You'll attract people who share
your positive attitude and they will want to be a partner in
your success. Encouragement is contagious—spread the word.
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